joeneato's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Mr_Artist attack]

cinematic marvel

vote 5

BreadFruitLock responds:

Indeed <3

[wheatclock distortion 01]

Oh, hello.

I didn't see you there. You know, I grew up with some real characters. Like that WheatClock fellow.
"Hey looka me, qqqq ssss fffhjkkkkk DDMA."

5.

wheatclock responds:

keep it cool.

[CCTT #1 Bracket A]

That fellow SlurpeeClock knows his stuff

Oh goodness he's quite the genius.

MawOfTheDragon responds:

Hi Slurpee

[goldencat rap !!!]

yarr

I hate explaining why things suck, because it's always so self-explanatory.
Here's a quick bullet summary:
-You didn't make the photoshops
-Robot voice
-Rapping robot voice
-Rapping robot voice with lyrics miraculously less clever than the real goldencat's
-Not fucking funny.

Have you seen any of BaconBurgerClock's Bedn movies? They were funny, adequatly done, and had decent voice acting. If you're going to mock someone, at least do it right.

The-Protector responds:

LOL ! you think that your movie are better ... OMG

[|Psycho II - Act One|]

2. Give a one-line summary of your review (50 char

As much as I submit to the ClockCrew=Dead ideal, this is really, really well done. The sound is classic Psycho, and the backgrounds are nothing short of awesome. The only problems are the animation, which is deceptively hard to get right with clocks, and the voices, which are the standard for ClockCrew movies anyway. And the intro's pretty drawn-owt. Other than that, it's great.
It kind of pisses me off, though. This kind of clock Flash should be the standard, not the exception. The amount of shitty clock movies floating through the Portal sets a negative stigma, and just makes the old ClockCrew look bad by proxy.

Well done, Golden.

[Cool Things 699]

Irene, come over here and take a gander at this ma

This is like the time Drunkmagikoopa cloned himself, except he screwed up and his clone sucked ass, but his clone didn't know it sucked ass, so it made a terrible flash movie.

DAIRYDOG responds:

i liek durnkmarcioopa do yuo?!/? lol thsi movie is good and i like it i do not suck ass but im glad yuo r beign so nice about it oh byt the wey thanks for votign 5 over and over agin thznk

[fun stuff 031]

aw man

now i need new pants

nazibomb responds:

try dockers stain defenders. to make each pair, a duck is drained with an orange juicer so the chemicals lining it's wings drip off and cover the pants.

[Piconjo Jelly 1]

oh there you are

I was really surprised at the overall quality of this submission At first glance it looks pretty crappy. I watched through a little bit of it though, and I was actually very much surprised. The opening musical score really complimented the early action.

Fifteen seconds in it seemed like it was another tossed together piece of crap from someone who was screwing around. I soon realized, however, that the author actually pushed himself quite far.
I thought, at first, that this was a newbie flash animator trying his damndest to put together something different. And then I glanced at the animator. Of course, it was all starting to make sense.
Vivid imagery coupled with minimalistic graphics.
Evenly timed music accompanying wizened themes.
Doubtless that this came from one of the best animators on Newgrounds.

Thirty seconds in, the fruits of my waiting finally show.
Harmonious with the graphics, the sound quality jumps up into a superior, incredible atonement.
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.
Should you watch this movie, be aware that the quality drives itself up immensely if you have an eye for it.

While watching, try to keep an open mind.
If you can’t keep an open mind, this movie certainly isn’t for you.
Think twice about everything you see and hear, and you come to the realization that this is merely a misunderstood masterpiece.
Heresy is an excellent word to describe the events that transpire within this Flash. Among the smooth incredible animation is an underlying avant-garde theme of pure genius.
Out the window with old concepts, this Flash comes as a shining beacon of originality.
Unabashedly breaking every rule of cinema, this Flash manages to create the ultimate illusion of “real” flash without resorted to shoddy fmv worksmanship.
The mere thought of voting lower than 5 is utter repugnance.

While I feel that it is nothing short of appropriate to just give this a ten and let it stand for itself, I feel there is so much more to say.
Apropos, it’s common for me to reward a movie with all tens and no explanation, and since I feel that such a special recognition is necessary, it comes also almost required of me as a reviewer, animator, and lo, human being to elaborate.
To merely let such a movie pass without 100% recognition would be folly.
Creating such genius is not the work of an everyday man. No, this is a revolutionary. You simply MUST watch this movie, and keep an open heart. You won’t believe what you’ve been missing out on, dropping to your knees and crying to the heavens “Why, god, why? Why must I have been blinded for so long?”
How often does a Flash movie cause us to ask ourselves why we exist? Not often, and certainly not in the manner that becomes so apparent here.
I, for one, am utterly humbled by the sheer brilliance at work here.
Nothing had prepared more for what I experienced here.
Genius, my good sirs. Genius.

The-Homo-Flash-Bros responds:

You are an amazing person. You can see certain things that are truly amazing! you not only deserve a responce, you deserve an award for your speech. I have never actually herd any one relize that i am a good animator. I have a degree in animation. The problem is I do not have a tablet. I must use mouse because the company i work for wont let me bring it home. I am suprised you have seen some of my tweens and they are professional (i hope) this review was helpfull and you are a god. I will always rember this review because it means much. You ar on our favorite authors list. Thank you for the constructive review. A resopnce is the least i can do!

Funjob(animator)

[Goodbye Superman]

sdaf

HAHAHA WALKEN, GET IT?

LIKE "WALKING"

WHOO

FourStar responds:

k

[2d Karma]

tweening monstrosity

This kind of crap is the reason the Underdog award is going to end up getting pulled.
The first four pages of reviews were all made on the same day, which is a rediculous amount for a submission with such a low score. Lo and behold, two of said pages are all 10's.

This award is too goddamned easy to rig.
It was originally created to encourage users to give constructive reviews, because they would have a part in determining a movie's rank, and it would allow for sleeper hits like Negro On A Canoe.

Instead shit like this and Gary Coleman Penguin assfuck their way in, and movies that deserved the award get pushed aside, and never get the attention they earned.

enjoy your filthy fucking award.

FiveStar responds:

if it's soooo easy, i guess you're just retarted cause you haven't gotten an award yet