joeneato's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Hostage Tribute]

vote 5 or the terrorists have already won

+7 manbabies

[2d Karma]

tweening monstrosity

This kind of crap is the reason the Underdog award is going to end up getting pulled.
The first four pages of reviews were all made on the same day, which is a rediculous amount for a submission with such a low score. Lo and behold, two of said pages are all 10's.

This award is too goddamned easy to rig.
It was originally created to encourage users to give constructive reviews, because they would have a part in determining a movie's rank, and it would allow for sleeper hits like Negro On A Canoe.

Instead shit like this and Gary Coleman Penguin assfuck their way in, and movies that deserved the award get pushed aside, and never get the attention they earned.

enjoy your filthy fucking award.

FiveStar responds:

if it's soooo easy, i guess you're just retarted cause you haven't gotten an award yet

[Dawn of the Dead in Milto]

Humor is lacking

The movie looked spectacular, but I just could not get into the humor. I feel like I should have liked it, but it focused so intensely on the humor, that when the humor failed me, the whole thing just felt tedious.

4/5

[Banana Fingers]

YES.

The feeling of monkey on my bananafingers is almost orgasmic.

[29 Day War]

Hmm...

The graphics were good, but kind of simple for such a gritty theme.
Evil-Dog did an awesome job with the music, but the voices could have used a little work. At first I thought the reporter was talking about Japan building giant robots. Heh. It took a bit to realize he was talking about the star wars program.
More thought-provoking than most flash, though it might have been more due to the vagaries than the actual plot. Regardless, it was very well put together.

It's interesting that star wars has always been thought of as a program to put an end to offensive missle launches, and here the possibility of offensive capabilities is shown.

Am I the only one seeing the parallels between this movie's plot and the theory that the US faked the attacks on the World Trade Center in order to start the war in the middle east? Was that intentional, or am I just seeing something that isn't there?

Also, I don't quite understand the significance of the grey mask. Is that representing the US masquerading as aliens?

[S P I D E R]

"Check out my hat. It's made of a giant spider."

I laffed.

bgryderclock responds:

i made j00 laff! W00t! <3 thanks!

[Salad Fingers Episode 3]

The series had fucking derailed

It's gone from rust fetish, to masochism and schizophrenia, to border-line necrophilia in three episodes.
It's hard to dicern whether you're seriously pushing this idea of a severely fucked up green hunchback with salad fingers, or if you're just screwing with people.

[In The Woods]

hahaha jesus

Everyone said they didn't expect the ending, and I figured it'd be something stupid and "scary," but THAT just blew me away.

This is so totally worth watching to the end.

Versucha responds:

Thanks for the review, especially that last sentence. I know that a lot of times people only vote for blams/saves, so they don't watch the whole thing. I used to vote the same way until I started animating (unless something is just so crappy I can't bear anymore of it lol).

Thanks for the great ratings.

[Lincolnfrog]

I do believe I've been blown away

Absolutely perfect in every way.

[OMFG!! Zombies!!!]

g/j

I like how their guts are visible. That is extraordinarily neat.

biblo responds:

Well it would have sucked if they weren't